Dear Friends,
Little things
that bring brought me sweet joy today…
·
Coffee with
cream and SF syrup—salted caramel of course.
I never liked coffee <<AT ALL>> until Millie got sick. Now it is a daily pleasure!
·
Precious
friends that help me when I get in a bind.
Today, one friend babysat SJ and Little Man, another took Abby to her
class painting party.
·
Getting to
road trip to Missouri with Katherine and a friend for her volleyball tournament
tomorrow. We are in an Air B&B that
is so cute and comfy. It is my first
time staying at one and I wonder if I will ever use a hotel again.
·
Time writing
tonight after drinking WAY TOO MUCH COFFEE for the day…
·
A Hubby that
stayed home to take care of our other children so I could take this trip.
·
Soft music
like “Lighthouse” from Scripture Lullabies.
Listening now because I can still focus with it playing.
·
My ‘new’ grey
fuzzy house shoes… Also am wearing my “Mama
Bear” shirt one of you sent to me.
Things that
do not bring me joy…
I have one
thing that I witnessed today that does not bring me joy. It is probably not worth
mentioning except it brings light to something we families struggle with as we
try to be transparent about our lives, especially our cancer journeys. I am going to share it in part, though anonymously
because my point of sharing is to address the behavior, not the commenter.
Today I had a
fellow cancer momma friend, Levy’s mom that posted a video of Leavyn getting
her ‘port’ accessed this week. She
posted it for two reasons:
·
to bring
awareness
·
2) to document what a brave overcomer her precious
little one is.
Someday this
virtual journal will be the very thing that shows their family how God sustained
them during this very difficult time of their lives.
What happened
today is the epitome of internet rudeness.
One of the commenters started criticizing Levy’s momma for posting the
video. She accused her of posting it for
her own personal gain, saying “Seems more like Mother’s journey than Leavyn’s”. Reality is we cancer mamas have nothing to
gain by being so transparent with our lives other than begging for people to
pray for our babies. The journey is one that
affects the whole family and is hard on every single member. Yes, some people do send money or gifts, but I
can ASSURE you none of us want anything more than for our baby to find
healing. These gifts bring the children
small amounts of joy in the midst of grueling hardship, but it does not make it
better…nothing but healing makes it better!
Even then the long-term side effects, scars, and PTSD will be present
forever in both the kids and their parents.
This lady
proceeded to tell my friend in part that, ‘I am older than you and know more
about cancer and the care of family members with cancer.’
My response to her thoughtless comment was, “all
I can say is I am sorry if you know more about cancer than a momma that is
standing beside her baby as she walks this journey. A journey that will either
bond a family, destroy a family, or both. As another cancer mama whose child
did not make it, I would ask that even if you are far more knowledgeable and
have watched hundreds of babies die, that you refrain from questioning those of
us in the journey. Each day is survival in a walk from hell (as a Christian I
do not use that word lightly). Levy’s momma is doing what is best for HER
child...not yours and not mine. Be an encouragement or consider biting your
tongue.”
I hope my response
was filled with GRACE first and TRUTH secondly.
The comments that are made, even if just off handed, HURT others’ hearts. As ‘cancer mamas’, we are doing the BEST WE
KNOW HOW in a time that no one truly knows how to navigate. As a ‘grieving mama’, I too am doing the best
I know how. It will not look like
someone else that is grieving-- we are all individuals, and we all process our
loss differently. All I can offer is the
hope that I cling too—a relationship with Jesus and him sustaining you.
Blessings
sweet friends…
｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★｡･:*:･ﾟ☆
I still
believe in Millie’s Miracle
｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ Hebrews 11:1 ｡･:*:･ﾟ☆
︵‿︵‿୨☆୧‿︵‿︵
#MilliesMiracle
#Forever3
#WithJesus
#Neuroblastoma
#ChildhoodCancer
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